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Geek Culture / Riddles

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Lost in Thought
20
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Joined: 4th Feb 2004
Location: U.S.A. : Douglas, Georgia
Posted: 19th May 2007 12:40
Quote: "A woman applies for a job as a secretary/typist. There are dozens of applicants for the job, and each is required to take a typing test. The woman can type only 11 WPM, yet she gets the job. How is this possible?"


She didn't wear any clothes.

Quote: "A digging expadition finds a grave with two perfectly preserved bodies inside.
Without a second thought, the diggers instantly knew the body's were those of Adam & Eve.
How?"


No belly buttons.

BMacZero
18
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Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 19th May 2007 16:05 Edited at: 19th May 2007 16:09
Quote: "The other applicants got less than 11WPM?"

Well, yeah that's true but these people are professionals.
Hints:
She was a good typist.
She was chosen becuase she was a good typist.


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Arkheii
21
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Joined: 15th Jun 2003
Location: QC, Philippines
Posted: 19th May 2007 17:14
This useful tool is commonly found in the range of 8 inches long. The functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes. It is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action. It boasts a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other. In use, it is inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements. Anyone found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsating sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements. When finally withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from its long, glistening shaft. After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often far less. What am I?



Blobby 101
18
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Joined: 17th Jun 2006
Location: England, UK
Posted: 19th May 2007 17:38
Quote: "This useful tool is commonly found in the range of 8 inches long. The functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes. It is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action. It boasts a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other. In use, it is inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements. Anyone found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsating sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements. When finally withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from its long, glistening shaft. After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often far less. What am I?
"



thanks to deathead for the sig!
Projects: alien abductor-5%
Fallout
22
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Joined: 1st Sep 2002
Location: Basingstoke, England
Posted: 19th May 2007 19:22
@Arkheii

A robotic ferret with rabies.


Zotoaster
19
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Joined: 20th Dec 2004
Location: Scotland
Posted: 19th May 2007 19:25
A toothbrush!

BMacZero
18
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Joined: 30th Dec 2005
Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 19th May 2007 20:21
Good one


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Arkheii
21
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Location: QC, Philippines
Posted: 19th May 2007 21:35 Edited at: 19th May 2007 21:37
Toothbrush is correct. What were you guys thinking?!

Quote: "A woman applies for a job as a secretary/typist. There are dozens of applicants for the job, and each is required to take a typing test. The woman can type only 11 WPM, yet she gets the job. How is this possible?"


The keys were scrambled?

BMacZero
18
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Joined: 30th Dec 2005
Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 19th May 2007 21:52
Hehe...not really, but in a way you're the closest yet


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
FROGGIE!
21
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Joined: 4th Oct 2003
Location: in front of my computer
Posted: 19th May 2007 22:11
Quote: "A woman applies for a job as a secretary/typist. There are dozens of applicants for the job, and each is required to take a typing test. The woman can type only 11 WPM, yet she gets the job. How is this possible?"


Was she typing mostly numbers?

Or is she the only one who can type in english?
Steve J
18
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Joined: 22nd Apr 2006
Location: Vancouver, Washington
Posted: 19th May 2007 22:14
She typed the fastest out of all of them.

pleading and needing and bleeding and breeding and feeding exceeding..where is everybody? trying and lying defying denying crying and dying..where is everybody?
Scraggle
Moderator
21
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Joined: 10th Jul 2003
Location: Yorkshire
Posted: 19th May 2007 22:18
She was in Germany where each word is about 300 characters long (or thereabouts)



Grandma
18
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Location: Norway, Guiding the New World Order
Posted: 19th May 2007 22:30
Maybe it's because she's doing translating.

Operation Mockingbird
Deathead
18
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Joined: 14th Oct 2006
Location:
Posted: 20th May 2007 00:22
I've got a really great riddle.
A man slaps himself twice with both hands how many times did he hit his face?

JOIN NOW!Or be square!
Diggsey
18
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Joined: 24th Apr 2006
Location: On this web page.
Posted: 20th May 2007 01:14
BMacZero
18
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Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 20th May 2007 04:19 Edited at: 20th May 2007 06:21
Quote: "She was in Germany where each word is about 300 characters long (or thereabouts)"

That's basically it . She was Chinese, and 11 WPM in Chinese is darn fast

[edit] the quote was screwed up


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Person99
18
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Location: Good question
Posted: 20th May 2007 05:47 Edited at: 20th May 2007 05:47
bmaczero, why would German words be around 300 characters long?

I don't any difference between Hello and Hallo excluding the E and A change.

Are the characters supposed to be different or something?

Who will die first?
BMacZero
18
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Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 20th May 2007 06:22
Well ask Scraggle, the answer was that she was Chinese, not that she was German


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Arkheii
21
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Joined: 15th Jun 2003
Location: QC, Philippines
Posted: 20th May 2007 06:37
Quote: "She was Chinese, and 11 WPM in Chinese is darn fast"


The longest Chinese words take at most 5 keys to type, plus 1 extra keystroke in case of ambiguity. My Chinese tutor can do up to 60 WPM


Quote: "A man slaps himself twice with both hands how many times did he hit his face?"


You never said he slapped his face

Person99
18
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Joined: 15th Dec 2005
Location: Good question
Posted: 20th May 2007 06:58
If anyone knows how, does anyone know how I can get edit back on my first post?

For some reason I can only edit the newer posts or something, so my first post is stuck with old riddles.


BTW, about the Chinese word riddle, there are several Chinese keyboards out there, so it is pretty much the same as an English one.

Who will die first?
BMacZero
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Posted: 20th May 2007 07:11
Meh, I guess that's kind of an outdated riddle then. I looked up a Chinese keyboard and it looks basically the same as an American one.


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Person99
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Location: Good question
Posted: 20th May 2007 07:40 Edited at: 20th May 2007 09:23
Probably. It's design is the same, but the letters aren't.

I have a new one and an older one that never got answered:

1. A man walks into a bar, and asks for a drink of water. The bartender pulls out a shotgun and points it at the man. The man then says "Thank you." and leaves.

-Answered
Why?

2. At 11:30 PM a man asks his boss for a promotion to Manager, but the boss yells at the man declines the man's request.
The man stays and gets a cup of coffee, and waits an hour.
The man comes back, and asks his boss "Can I take the day off and get some before starting as the new manager?", and the boss replies "Sure, be back by 10:00 AM the day after tomorrow."

Why?

Hints:
The boss did not have any mental disorders.

Who will die first?
Benjamin
21
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Location: France
Posted: 20th May 2007 07:45
Quote: "1. A man walks into a bar, and asks for a drink of water. The bartender pulls out a shotgun and points it at the man. The man then says "Thank you." and leaves.

Why?"

He had hiccups.

Tempest (DBP/DBCe)
Multisync V1 (DBP/DBCe)
Person99
18
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Joined: 15th Dec 2005
Location: Good question
Posted: 20th May 2007 09:22
Correct.

Who will die first?
Jess T
Retired Moderator
21
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Joined: 20th Sep 2003
Location: Over There... Kablam!
Posted: 20th May 2007 14:20
So, what, did the bartender have a morbid fear of hiccups?

LiT, that's right
Since Adam & Eve were (supposedly) not born, but created, when the two perfectly preserved bodies were found, they had no belly buttons and thus it was concluded that they only people they could be were the origins of the Human Race.

Nintendo DS & Dominos :: DS Dominos
http://jt0.org
Arkheii
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Location: QC, Philippines
Posted: 20th May 2007 14:38
Quote: "So, what, did the bartender have a morbid fear of hiccups?"


Aside from drinking water, other people claim that frightening the person also gets rid of hiccups. Don't know if it's true, though. When I have hiccups, I hold my breath, filling my lungs with air so as to stop my diaphragm's spasms. Then it's gone after several seconds.

Person99
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Location: Good question
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:15
Hiccups are more of a brain thing. You can get rid of them if you think you know the way.
I used to be able to get rid of them by doing jumping jacks, until I found that out, now I have to get as many distractions as possible and wait for them to disappear.

Who will die first?
Benjamin
21
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Location: France
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:16
Quote: "I hold my breath, filling my lungs with air so as to stop my diaphragm's spasms. Then it's gone after several seconds."

Same here.

Tempest (DBP/DBCe)
Multisync V1 (DBP/DBCe)
dark coder
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Joined: 6th Oct 2002
Location: Japan
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:24 Edited at: 20th May 2007 22:11
Quote: "Hiccups are more of a brain thing. You can get rid of them if you think you know the way. "


Depends on the cause, I only get them due to food moving slowly down my esophagus, water fixes that.

I have one.

What has many elbows but no arms, no hands but can strangle people?

Solved.


Benjamin
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Location: France
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:26
Quote: "What has many elbows but no arms, no hands but can strangle people?"

An armless strangler, I already answered this one.

Tempest (DBP/DBCe)
Multisync V1 (DBP/DBCe)
LD52
18
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Joined: 31st Aug 2006
Location: Internet
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:29 Edited at: 20th May 2007 20:29
There are 7 pages now and its getting abit hard and annoying to find the answer to some riddles - can't the answers to the riddles be posted under the riddle in a code snippet so if the person wants to see the answer they click the code snippet and see the answer and if they want to try to solve it themselves first then the dont open the code snippet till they are ready to see if their answer is right.
It would be very helpful.
Grandma
18
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Joined: 26th Dec 2005
Location: Norway, Guiding the New World Order
Posted: 20th May 2007 20:30 Edited at: 20th May 2007 20:31
Quote: ""What has many elbows but no arms, no hands but can strangle people?""


A deformed dark jedi.

Operation Mockingbird
BMacZero
18
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Location: E:/ NA / USA
Posted: 20th May 2007 22:08 Edited at: 20th May 2007 22:10
Quote: "What has many elbows but no arms, no hands but can strangle people?"

A rope? More likely a length of curved pipe, ropes don't really have elbows.

[Edit]Maybe after a riddle has been solved the original post containing the riddle could be edited, and the answer could be added in a code snippet box in case another person comes along later and wants to try it. Many people would probably just think for a minute or so, then give up and check the answer.


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Zotoaster
19
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Location: Scotland
Posted: 20th May 2007 22:09
I would say a chain

dark coder
22
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Location: Japan
Posted: 20th May 2007 22:10 Edited at: 20th May 2007 22:11
Yes it is a rope! they do have elbows, the U shape on a curved rope is called an elbow, or at least the Wiki page I was reading this morning seemed to think it was :p.

BMacZero
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Posted: 20th May 2007 22:12 Edited at: 20th May 2007 22:29
Cool

Here's a good one:
If you are in a race, and you pass the person in 2nd place, what place are you in?
Answer:



"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Zotoaster
19
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Location: Scotland
Posted: 20th May 2007 22:21
2nd

BMacZero
18
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Posted: 20th May 2007 22:29
Easy . No one said first...


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Deathead
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Posted: 20th May 2007 22:50
Quote: ""A man slaps himself twice with both hands how many times did he hit his face?"

You never said he slapped his face"

You gave it away.Pfft.
Nice guess!

JOIN NOW!Or be square!
Person99
18
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Location: Good question
Posted: 23rd May 2007 01:04 Edited at: 23rd May 2007 01:09
Here is an easy one:

A man jumps off of a tree. He lives, but barely.
The man then gets back up and continues walking.
He trips over a stick, and falls into some weeds.
For some reason, while in the weeds, he dies.
He then gets back up and walks off.

He is not a zombie.
He is not invincible.
There are no healers around.
God is not bored.
He is not a toy.
He is not a puppet.
He did not go to the afterlife.
The weeds are just plain weeds, not "special" weeds.
He is not asleep.
He dies on earth, and gets back up on earth.
And no, the world is not being raided by toasters.

How is this possible?


Quote: "There are 7 pages now and its getting abit hard and annoying to find the answer to some riddles - can't the answers to the riddles be posted under the riddle in a code snippet so if the person wants to see the answer they click the code snippet and see the answer and if they want to try to solve it themselves first then the dont open the code snippet till they are ready to see if their answer is right.
It would be very helpful."


If edit wasn't disabled on old posts, they would all go on to the first post.

It would be a good idea, but when people put the answers in code snippets, a lot of people will probably just look at the code snippet and copy down the answer.

Most people are keeping up with the last 2 pages.
That is what I do.

Who will die first?
Gil Galvanti
19
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Location: Texas, United States
Posted: 23rd May 2007 01:19 Edited at: 23rd May 2007 01:22
This one should be easy:

A man uses 10 gallons of gas going to work and back every week. One week he only had to work half-days. How much gas did he use that week?


Zotoaster
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Location: Scotland
Posted: 23rd May 2007 01:52
10 gallons heh

Gil Galvanti
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Location: Texas, United States
Posted: 23rd May 2007 02:17
heh, was hoping that the half day would throw someone off


BMacZero
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Posted: 23rd May 2007 02:25
Maybe after a riddle has been solved the original post containing the riddle could be edited.


"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire!" —Jaya Ballard, task mage
Person99
18
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Location: Good question
Posted: 23rd May 2007 07:13
Yeah, I like that. Well, once someone answers my easy (I thought) riddle, I'll edit my post too.

Who will die first?
Robot
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Posted: 23rd May 2007 11:56
That will of course be nothing.
Evil Star
18
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Location: England, Colchester
Posted: 23rd May 2007 19:31
I got one:

Mountains shall crumble and temples shall fall,
No man can survive its endless call

http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/8749/evilstarjb5.jpg
Gil Galvanti
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Location: Texas, United States
Posted: 23rd May 2007 21:24
Quote: "Mountains shall crumble and temples shall fall,
No man can survive its endless call"

The end of the world


Hobgoblin Lord
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Joined: 29th Oct 2005
Location: Fall River, MA USA
Posted: 23rd May 2007 22:34
Nine within nine,
Forty-five in every line,
Same elements in all,
Still different each fall.

What am I?

Evil Star
18
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Location: England, Colchester
Posted: 23rd May 2007 22:46
Quote: "The end of the world"


Nope

http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/8749/evilstarjb5.jpg

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