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Geek Culture / The Big List of Oxymorons 1.0

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HZence
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 09:59
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*cough* Yeah. It's 2 A.M. and I'm bored. So here's a thread about oxymorons - every time you think of one/hear/see/crap one, just post it. If ya feel like it.

Oxymoron #1. Microsoft Works.
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Eric T
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 10:08
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Military Intellegence

Opinions are like a$$holes, Everybody has one.
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Dave J
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 10:19
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lol, hmm... let's see:

Quote: "50. Act naturally
49. Found missing
48. Resident alien
47. Advanced BASIC
46. Genuine imitation
45. Airline Food
44. Good grief
43. Same difference
42. Almost exactly
41. Government organization
40. Sanitary landfill
39. Alone together
38. Legally drunk
37. Silent scream
36. British fashion
35. Living dead
34. Small crowd
33. Business ethics
32. Soft rock
31. Butt Head
30. Military Intelligence
29. Software documentation
28. New York culture
27. New classic
26. Sweet sorrow
25. Childproof
24. "Now, then ..."
23. Synthetic natural gas
22. Christian Scientists
21. Passive aggression
20. Taped live
19. Clearly misunderstood
18. Peace force
17. Extinct Life
16. Temporary tax increase
15. Computer jock
14. Plastic glasses
13. Terribly pleased
12. Computer security
11. Political science
10. Tight slacks
9. Definite maybe
8. Pretty ugly
7. Twelve-ounce pound cake
6. Diet ice cream
5. Rap music
4. Working vacation
3. Exact estimate
2. Religious tolerance
1. Microsoft Works
"


Sorry, had to do that just to ruin this thread
That's a pretty standard list found in about a million places and I probably wouldn't have posted it had you not put "Microsoft Works" as the #1 oxymoron

"Computers are useless they can only give you answers."
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Dave J
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 10:24
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Oh, and just for fun, let's see how many places we can find that hosts that list. I'll start us off:

http://s-2000.com/jokes/ind/81.html
http://www.bouldertherapist.com/html/humor/WordPlays/50_oxymorons.htm
http://www.webpanda.com/ponder/oxymorons.htm
http://www.cobalt-blue.com/humor/oxy.htm
http://www.secretmotive.com/fun/plainfunny/top_50_oxymorons.asp
http://www.geocities.com/kashalinka/ReadingRm/jokes/oxymorons.html
http://www.afund.com/afundA98oxy.htm
http://www.professorcornbread.com/humor/jokes/oxymorons.php
http://soli.inav.net/~catalyst/Humor/oxymoron.htm
http://www.funy.net/otherjokes772.htm

That's the whole first page of a google search and believe me they continue for page after page of search results. Mind you, they're always the exact same list as well lol.

"Computers are useless they can only give you answers."
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HZence
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 10:28
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Damn. Couldn't you have at least pretended to not have known that...

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Dave J
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 11:01
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>=D

"Computers are useless they can only give you answers."
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Hamish McHaggis
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 11:11
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bitter sweet

cuRant PRogekt: a three-de map editer
Why the hell'd you ask me for crying out loud!?!
Athelon XP 1400 Plus - Nvidia Geforce MX400 - 256mb RAM
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adr
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 13:25
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British fashion

oi...

*looks at what he's wearing*

oh ok then...

Bender:Blackmail’s such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The x makes it sound cool.
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Joeyjoejoe Shabadoo
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OH oh, no I have forgotten.
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Ian T
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 18:15
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Rap music



--Mouse

Famous Fighting Furball
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Kanzure
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 18:21
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Microsoft Help
Free donations
Evil Church (its another one of dem dere oxy moron dudes..lol..)

~Morph/Kanzure
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HZence
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 19:49
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Rap music...haha. that is fuh knee.

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CrayZemon
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British Dentistry
Amazingly Boring
Good Pittbulls
Healthy Knees
Terribly Good

"I need gopher-chucks!!"
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Solidz Snake
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 21:32
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dislocated bones

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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Hamish McHaggis
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 22:07 Edited at: 15th Jul 2003 22:10
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Pretty ugly
Living dead

cuRant PRogekt: a three-de map editer
Why the hell'd you ask me for crying out loud!?!
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Kanzure
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Un Dead (warcraft 3)
Apple Computer

~Morph/Kanzure
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Eric T
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 23:37
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Quote: "Apple Computer
"


that is f***** funny sh*t

Opinions are like a$$holes, Everybody has one.
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Kanzure
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Posted: 15th Jul 2003 23:50
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Glad somebody enjoys it

~Morph/Kanzure
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HZence
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I enjoy it.

Half Full

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Kanzure
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Half Empty

~Morph/Kanzure
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heartbone
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Advanced Microsoft

As heard in the MSN8 TV ads.

The more you see, the more you know.
The more you know, the more you see.
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Solidz Snake
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oki, u all may bang my backside for asking this (wtf?! u didn't know Solidz?!)..


... but err.. wats an Oxymoron actually?

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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Blazer
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 02:03
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cleave

1. to hold to

2. to cut

As I walk through the vally of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.
- Psalms 23:4
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Solidz Snake
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 02:08
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say what?

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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Kanzure
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An oxymoron is something that contradicts it self..exmaple: "act naturally". Well..for one, why do you need to ACT naturally? Acting is NOT to be natural..er..if you don't get it go read a dictionary lol.

~Morph/Kanzure
CodeNation
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John H
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 04:32 Edited at: 16th Jul 2003 04:32
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Jumbo Shrimp , Icey Hot

RPGamer

Current Project: Eternal Destiny
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Go to the Eternal Destiny Forum!
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Arrow
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Final Fantasy 9

Teenage Male Geek + Female Remotly Intersted in Common Geek Activities = Teenage Male Jackass
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HZence
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Final Fantasy 2.
Final Fantasy 3.
Final Fantasy 4.
Final Fantasy 5.
Final Fantasy 6.
Final Fantasy 7. (which rocked!)
Final Fantasy 8.
(already said).
Final Fantasy 10.
Final Fantasy 11.

SW Games - www.freewebs.com/swgames

Yeah, I know, I only have one game. Yeah, I know it sucks. But I made it! Me!
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Dave J
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 12:12
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...I don't get it

"Computers are useless they can only give you answers."
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Solidz Snake
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me too.. (Final Fantasy?)

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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Rob K
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It was called final fantasy, but it wasn't final was it - because each one wasn't the last one.


BLUE GUI Plugin: http://blue.robert-knight.net
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jeffmosesuk
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Microsoft Works

lmao

"Time to play."
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Arkheii
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short pants; long shorts
Liquid Snake
half-ass
Michael Learns to Rock

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jeffmosesuk
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Automatic Updates (You always have to click at least one button and then reboot )

"Time to play."
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Arkheii
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good parenting
friendly neighbor
3dsmax interface
good intentions

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jeffmosesuk
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soft porn

"Time to play."
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Solidz Snake
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uh uh uh i think i got it..


.. bouncing titties

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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jeffmosesuk
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???

even odds

"Time to play."
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Dave J
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 17:26
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Quote: "It was called final fantasy, but it wasn't final was it - because each one wasn't the last one.
"

That's still not an oxymoron though, oxymoron's are to do with a 'phrase' not something that happens.

"Computers are useless they can only give you answers."
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jeffmosesuk
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useful oxymoron

"Time to play."
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Hamish McHaggis
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 21:48 Edited at: 16th Jul 2003 21:51
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Oxymorons are actually when you put 2 opposites together to form a phrase.

EDIT

Sorry, thats the best type of oxymoron (I think), but they can just be words that contridict themselves.

cuRant PRogekt: a three-de map editer
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Ian T
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Seedless Melon.

--Mouse

Famous Fighting Furball
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Yarbles
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 22:01 Edited at: 16th Jul 2003 22:17
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I got some that, I think, have not yet been mentioned:


Gulf War Vetran

Compassionate Conservative

Country Music

Final Beta

please visit http://www.realitytwin.com
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Arrow
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Ok I haven't seen a decent oxymoron since my last post other than "even odds".

Teenage Male Geek + Female Remotly Intersted in Common Geek Activities = Teenage Male Jackass
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Yarbles
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And the Best one of All..........


DarkBASIC Professional




please visit http://www.realitytwin.com
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HZence
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Posted: 16th Jul 2003 22:45
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Exeat: "That's still not an oxymoron though, oxymoron's are to do with a 'phrase' not something that happens"

That's not something that happened, it's the title of the video game. If it really was a "final fantasy" they would have stopped at one but they're still making them...so it's an oxymoron!!! you're an oxymoron too

SW Games - www.freewebs.com/swgames

Yeah, I know, I only have one game. Yeah, I know it sucks. But I made it! Me!
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HZence
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Mouse: "Seedless Melon."

How the heck is that an oxymoron?

SW Games - www.freewebs.com/swgames

Yeah, I know, I only have one game. Yeah, I know it sucks. But I made it! Me!
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Solidz Snake
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Posted: 17th Jul 2003 00:54
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microwave oven

hmm..

how 'bout this.. BAT MAN

Snake? What happened? Snake? Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!!! - Colonel Roy Campbell

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Ian T
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Posted: 17th Jul 2003 00:57
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'How the heck is that an oxymoron?'

Just like all the others.

--Mouse

Famous Fighting Furball
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HZence
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Posted: 17th Jul 2003 01:00
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Oh, that explains it...? Lol.

SW Games - www.freewebs.com/swgames

Yeah, I know, I only have one game. Yeah, I know it sucks. But I made it! Me!
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