1. You apologise for possibly pronouncing "Ouya" incorrectly. Why? It's a dumb name. TotalBiscuit calls it the "Eeyor".
2. You go on a bit too much about this one guy who couldn't get it delivered to him, you didn't really talk about anything other than him. And I don't see how not getting something delivered could be described as a cluster ****.
3. I am not averse to swearing, I thought this was actually quite funny: "In this case Ouya is failing the most basic thing about delivering your product, that is: delivering your ****ing product.", but a lot of the time your swearing doesn't add any emphasis to what you are saying.
You mix your words quite a lot and hover around subjects for a bit too long for my liking. I think a bit more work on writing/editing and rehearsing your script would help a lot. You seem a bit more light-hearted in this one than your previous game reviews, even though you are clearly angry, and that's good.
I think you just need to be a bit more critical of yourself. If you'd gone over this once or twice you could have tightened it up a lot. If you have gone over it several times and couldn't tell what needed changing then I'd suggest watching some videos by people like TotalBiscuit and Campster on youtube.
Formerly OBese87.
