UPDATE!! I got it to work!! sorry for wasting anyone's time! So after some digging i found this post that explains my problem exactly
https://forum.thegamecreators.com/thread/219513?page=1 and the solution didn't work. BUT mage said his version of DBP was the latest
Quote: "So maybe it has to do with my older version of DBP"
so I figured i'd give that DBPro 9Ex thing a try. I always assumed it'd crash the compiler since that's what happens with the git version BUT my copied version did not. .. so i tried to do the following:
print "hello world"
wait key
set display mode 640,480,32,1
set window off
print "it worked!"
wait 10000
end
AND IT WORKS!!! ..the text flickers though BUT if sprites don't then I'll be so happy!
**EDIT because I feel bad for posting again**
Scratch that. opening a project and compiling results in the compiler literally doing nothing. no error message. no exe. just a partial green bar for the progress before the editor resumes as normal

so its time to re-downgrade until i figure out how to get it working,,
**EDIT TO THE EDIT**
Not sure if it's a registry issue or what but now even deleting and re-copying my tried and true install over from an older computer won't let it compile anymore... quite convinced I essentially banned myself from DBP
**EDIT TO THE EDIT TO THE EDIT**
So,,, I suppose I solved it in a way.. a VERY drawn-out way that took hours and will take hours more, but with less tears. So I scrounged up my old DarkGameStudio CD and installed DBP from that. Then I copied the compiler folder from my original installation to this "new" one (so it can be activated). Then I was able to successfully install (for the first time it recognized my install now) the U77 DBP upgrade. Then I implemented the DBPro9Ex thing. THEN I copied all my projects over and merged with the default ones. Then I had to painstakingly sift through the default ones who had their media-files corrupted since it's an old disc and/or probably required the internet for the additional files. AND THENNN I still had the same problem but discovered any NEW project I saved would load successfully. . . So.. I spent the next few hours copying the code onto the clipboard, creating a new project, pasting the code, renaming everything to how it was, jerry-rig my essential programs to display at all (they are able to flicker (i guess i need to learn how to do the sync thing correctly

)) ensuring they can be opened and ran, and repeating for every single one ..manually.
BUT now I have that "elegant install" i been b!tc#ing about. The help files work. compiles. uses a later version of directX. automatic compatibility. just a new thing to learn about refreshing for text elements in simple programs that I assumed I knew.. BUT FINALLY it works. Would delete this thread if i could. Marking this as an answer in case someone has similar problem (though i dont know how they'll get a disc for that part

)