Pancakes:
* Unlike its cratered cousin, the waffle, it is superior in its ability to act like a sponge and absorb the syrup with which it is often covered with; whereas the waffle simply forces the sweet, viscous liquid into the confined nooks covering its top and bottom surfaces.
* Can come in a wider variety of shapes and sizes; whereas most waffles tend to be either circular or rectangular (with perforations), or occasionally in the shape of mickey mouse's head.
* Designed with the common man in mind. All that is required for pancake generation is a simple frying pan - while waffle-generation requires that a special utensil be purchased.
* Pancakes are quite pleasant to look at and were used to soothe anxious or nervous patients during the 19th century.
* Pancakes have been proven to be much more successful then waffles at winning "fights to the death".
* Can be used for napkins, plates, hats, shoes, body-armor, cushions, frisbees and as wall decorations.
* Are much more aerodynamic than waffles, as demonstrated by pancake's ability to remain airborne when flipped, while the waffle tends to fall like an lead weight when flipped.
* Outnumber the waffle 5 to one. At diners, you can get a whole stack of five, fluffy, buttermilk pancakes for the price of one rock-hard Belgian waffle that was probably frozen.
* Can cure any illness whatsoever. Waffles only cause them.
At one point, the US Air force considered using giant pancakes as a vertical takeoff/landing fighter but a majority of pilots were unable to differentiate its front and back ends; rendering navigation well-nigh impossible. This problem was further compounded by the tendency of said pilots to mark the dorsal-anterior end by biting it - but then become overwhelmed by its spongy goodness and consume a fair portion of the aircraft. The Flying Flapjack sized in at an amazing 26 feet 8 inches in diameter, making it easily the biggest pancake in the world. Unfortunately, due to drastic budget cuts on the project, the airforce was forced to cancel its pancake airfoil projects and settled instead for a nice, tasty breakfast.
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