I was in the Air-Force for 4 years (1998-2002). I was single, just graduated High School and not sure of what direction my life was going in. I had a lot of great experiences, and some not so great.
My Job was in electronics as a "Ground Aeorospace Radar Tech/Op" or "Autotracking Radar" A.K.A.(Auto-Tracker). It was basically like a "real-life" Video-Game/simulation. A lot like "Top-Gun" Red vs. Blue team. We were the ground radar defense(enemy) simulating different types of Surface-to-Air-Missiles (SAM Sites) and AAA(Anti-Aircraft-Artillery). The blue team training-pilots, tried to take us out, and we tried to knock-em out of the sky. All of the info was networked to a "War Room" & SATCOM - back at the base. The computers decided who lived and who died based on the info.
My Job didn't have any real "War-Time" commitment. We trained pilots on a bombing range. As you might know, the Air Force is the one branch that sends it's Officer's to war. Everyone else is merely support. So during exercises of "War-Time" I had a second Job Title. I was allocated to the "Motor Pool". Basically this meant I learned how to drive all types of vehicles from fork-lifts, to busses, "Big Rigs", Deuce and 1/2's etc... Mostly I drove the fork-lift to weigh and load palettes onto aircraft for support (ie. medical, Equipment) or I drove Officers/Commanders back and forth to the airport.
Miltary life can be good, but it has some negatives that only you and your family can discuss. For some, the positives outweigh the negatives. It's important that you choose the right career for you & your family. I don't know a lot about the Navy, but being on a Sub. you will more than likely be away from your family for no less than six-months. That can be a big strain on you and them.
I've seen families both in Base-housing and Off-Base-Housing, and each family handles things differently. The worst part is being away or having to relocate. Your family has to be willing to pack-up on a moments notice. It can be stressful. Spouses may have to leave jobs, if they work. kids have to change schools.
It's so tough to give advice to anyone, especially someone with a family. I was single and whatever I did it really only effected me. Everything that you see in the regular world happens on a base. And it can be even more devestating as it's strange to have your work, bosses, peers, co-workers, know your personal life. I have seen more divorces in the military than I would "see" in civilian life. Because everything is close knit, everyone knows everyone elses businesss. I have seen wives be arrested, family disputes, cheating when the spouse is away. Nothing like seeing a good friends wife at the Enlisted Club on a Friday Night getting their "drink on" and leaving with someone else.
I honestly thought these things wouldn't happen. I was a bit naive. But all the problems that face the real world, face military families as well. I thought that I would be surrounded by noble heroes. And while you are, it's just like any other occupation... be it policemen, Doctors, lawyers, etc... people are just people. So while it was limited; we had theft, family abuse, drunk driving, drug abuse etc... Children on base also had their fair share of issues, especially teenage youth whose parent/s were away.
That's some of the bad news. There is also plenty of good. Lots of support, and plenty of reasons to make the military a carreer. I receieved top-notch health care. It was a great job, and I met really good people. The military paid 85% of my schooling while I was in. I recieved over 50 College credits for my Tech School (which was free) alone. So finishing my A.A.S was fairly easy, and I didn't lose much ground then my peers back home.
The housing was nicer than many areas in the U.S., many of my friends had a much better life than they could ever have imagined back home. But for me... I guess growing up on Long Island NY and being 35 minutes from Manhattan, the military was a bit depressing for me. I came from a middle-class family, and for Long Island middle-class I guess was a lot different than other areas. So depending on where you get stationed can make a big difference. I got sent to Idaho for 3 years. It had a lot to offer, and was a change, but military life didn't appeal to me after 4 years.
Trust me, there are times that I regret leaving. I have thought about re-enlisting into the Air National Guard over the years. I was lucky to be employed by a School District, and a Union. It's hard for me to imagine how people handle job losses. It's something that terrifies me, and actually has prevented me from seeking other employment opportunities. I am in Networking now, and have come across numerous lucrative offers. But when I hear/see the job cuts via friends or in the paper, I'm glad I stayed where I am.
I think it's important to go in without "Rose-Colored glasses". i don't mean for this post to scare you. I could spend an equal amount of time explaining all the good about the military..
I really feel for you and your situation. Let me know if I can offer any more information or help. I know how scary these times can be.